And at times sitting in my rental house unchanged from the 1950’s looking out from the hill it’s on towards the ocean I can’t always tell what decade or lifetime I am in for that matter. I struggle to discern what is this life, what is a past life, what is just a hallucination or daydream. It all blends together.
I have been all around the world, but the only times I have first known I was truly in love with a women in this lifetime was sitting in a view like this in Southern California looking at the palms together and feeling the ocean air on a perfect Southern California night. It’s like it takes me back to a time where love was my whole and complete life.
And there are hole in the wall places I have been to in LA, where it’s suddenly clear I am no longer in this life, but all of a sudden in that past life. A star again, surrounded by stars, feeling all again like maybe we can save the world. And when in this in between worlds the most inexplicable things happen.
When thinking to myself I wonder what if I have 4 lives, with a couple already lived and a couple still to go. I would think I would find you in every life, but in this one I’ve already spent way too much time wondering where you were, and if I would ever find you again by my side.
What if I just found you again one day-by my side, somewhere I never expected. Could all suddenly be right with the world?
And what If we were famous stars in a previous life, but we are now resigned to a life of normalcy or at least I am? Resigned to just the joys in routines and rhythms rather than the highs of feeling like our mere presence and voice can save the world?
Can we coexist in such a dynamic, or do we both have to become stars again, together, like our love and lives depend on it?